Why Not? — Natasha Aquin

What’s the most uncomfortable or difficult decision deep down you know you need to make but are simply putting it off because it’s easier to avoid it? This decision could be something small, for instance the bad habit of eating an entire bag of Ruffles chips when you’re stressed (totally guilty of this), or something life altering, such as ending and walking away from a relationship. Subconsciously you know that if you were able to go through with it, your life would be substantially healthier, happier, or even more fulfilling. You can even look at it in the reverse, and it could be something that you add to your life versus taking something away. For example, you know it’s beneficial to take your vitamins every day, but somehow you manage to make enough excuses such as: “I forgot. I’m too busy.” to justify not being committed to the follow through.

Whatever it may be holding you back. Fear. Laziness. Not feeling deserving enough. Let me just say that the lack of action is paralyzing in its own way. In reality, we’re just holding ourselves back from our potential or from experiencing something fucking epic. If you don’t do something because of fear of failing, I believe you’ve already failed. So, what’s the worst that can happen if you try something and it doesn’t work out? You simply shift directions. I’m not suggesting you throw caution to the wind, but I think it’s important to take a leap of faith when the outcome could be something really wonderful.

When I made the decision to quit my job, sell my things, and book a one-way ticket to India, I did so because I weighed the pros and cons. The final decision came down to “what is the worst-case scenario if I go through with this?”. That’s how I’m starting to approach most things in my life. The worst-case in this particular situation was that I end up back in Toronto, temporarily living on my parents’ sofa (they don’t know this yet), and I find a job in advertising working for someone else. The worst-case isn’t too far from where I was when I started thinking about this journey in the first place.

So, it’s been just over a month since I’ve left Canada and I still don’t really have much structure or a long-term plan. Maybe that’s the best part. What I do know is each day has been different from the other and I can for certain say I’ve lived to the fullest given all circumstances and opportunities.

Most days I spend enjoying food and each meal without interruption or distraction – maybe too much, exploring the place I’m in, doing a bit of work (details on that to come), and putting my health first and being active. I haven’t had a sip of alcohol since I’ve left Canada. I’m avoiding eating all meat as well – except that $20.00 USD Double Whopper with cheese in the airport of the Maldives because I was starving. I’ve wanted to completely cut out sugar but I just can’t say bye to those Nutella banana crepes each Indian village makes so well. As a result, I’m feeling clearheaded and grounded.

After I met Dallas in the café in Fort Kochi, I ended up checking into a hostel because I was feeling the need for some consistent interaction. I ended up meeting a wonderful lively group of Brits, a visual artist from New Zealand, and a Brazilian corporate lawyer turned life coach. We traveled together for just over two weeks, and during this time, we went with the flow, did what we want, and had a great time getting to know each other and appreciating the places we were.

We traveled south to the town of Allepey where we rented a houseboat for a night, it cost us $40.00 each, where we traveled the backwaters. It was incredible and we were completely disconnected. I couldn’t check my emails, I was inaccessible and it was a beautiful thing.

I truly believe everything happens for a reason. You meet people because you’re supposed to. You encounter opportunities and challenges because there are lessons to be learnt or scenarios to be experienced. Everything builds upon each other and if you embrace this, life is so sweet.

After Allepey we ended up in the beach town of Varkala which is a mix of wealthy Indians on vacation and travelers of all ages and backgrounds that are looking to explore their spiritual side with crystal healing and yoga. It felt like Goa used to be. I loved it! I could have stayed for an extensive amount of time, except I was kicking off a few work projects and the internet was unreliable. Oh! And two of the Brits were heading to the Maldives, which has always been my dream destination of mine, so I knew I had to tag along and not miss out on that. Crystal clear blue water and the whitest sand beaches you can imagine. I only thought that honeymooners went to the Maldives but nope! You can stay on one of the local islands and still enjoy all the beautiful environments the country has to offer without having a husband in tow.

This takes me back to where I started this post. I’ve felt and lived it for years. Perhaps this is a bit of a generalizing but it’s almost as though you need to reach the height of constant bullshit and dissatisfaction to try living a life that is something radically different from what you know. So, my suggestion to you. If there’s something uncomfortable, scary, or difficult you feel as though you need to try or do. Just do it.